Vocabulary of Different Worlds
How we can connect to each other through our words
One
While a go, the CEO of a company where I and my team were starting a new organizational development project told me, it's good you have worked with software companies. It means you understand this industry and, can help us better than someone from other industries. This is the first assessment of such consulting or developmental projects. Organizations assess the background of the practitioners or consultants and decide whether to continue the work or not.
I knew what he meant. He was pointing to the mechanics of the work. Understanding the processes, structures, and standards. But there was something beyond the process and structures.
I started my career as an IT professional. I've worked for years in tech companies. We had our jokes based on our profession. We had our vocabulary. It was known to our community.
The CEO, may not be aware but trusted to make the contract because he heard familiar words. I had the vocabulary. Language is beyond the processes and structures. It's beyond the mechanics.
Two
In another meeting with an American and Dutch friend, we were talking about the possibility of a collaboration. Will, the American friend asked about the commitment to the work we want to do.
I replied let's define the commitment. In my country, Iran, with its cultural context commitment can be different than what you think. The commitment here can be more about pure trust. It's a level of relationship that can be like I have your back, I never let you down.
Does it mean similar in your culture?
We followed the conversation and we were trying to enter each other world by understanding the meaning of words.
Three
I had a conversation with a colleague. She was leading some challenging meetings with one of the clients. I was trying to support her by giving her a deeper understanding of the client's situation and how she may find possibilities through the challenges.
She handled those meetings successfully. One morning she was reporting to me about what has gone with the client and how she could manage the last meeting. I replied:
Great job. You've done perfectly.
I had a good feeling about her performance and my support.
One week later I learned, that it was just my feeling and she has felt the opposite. She quitted from the company. All the words I used to support her were meaningless in her world. But, in my world the narrative was different.
We hadn't had a chance to understand our world of vocabulary. We couldn't connect. The worlds never connected.
Vocabulary of Domains
Ken and Mary Gergen, two pioneers of social constructionism mention:
Every domain of life has its own vocabulary that defines the rules of the game as well as that domain creates a new language. The world of barbers is different from the world of scientists.
When we travel to a new country with a different language, naturally we start two kinds of inquiry. One is the inquiry about the translation of words. Like what they say for greeting. How they say thank you.
The second level of inquiry is about cultural norms and how people behave in social situations. What they value and, how language serves or creates the social structure.
Meg Wheatley in her book Turning to One Another gives an example that relates to what I try to say:
Among the Shona people of Zimbabwe, this is how they greet one another.
“Marare hare? ”
Did you sleep?
“ Ndarare kana mararawo.”
I slept well if you slept well.
“Ndarare”
I slept.
“Ndiripo Makadiwo.”
I am here if you are here.
“Ndiripo.”I
am here.
There are different worlds in this world. Different worlds are divided by country borders, local cultures, social norms, interests, and so on. This list of domains (worlds) can continue endlessly.
Each world has its language. The gateway to entering these worlds is understanding the vocabulary. As a consultant or a professional moving to a new situation or starting a project, the first step can be a vocabulary update. As a new parent, you enter a new world and you acquire new vocabulary. With reading a text also you receive a new domain of vocabulary. Intimacy is also the result of shared vocabulary. This is how different worlds can connect and become one. It goes beyond borders. It can even touch hearts. It begins with listening and curiosity. Not just for the translations but how the people of that life domain live the vocabulary.
Like the Shona people:
I'm here if you are here!
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